While not all aspects of our lives will always go as planned, people who take responsibility for their choices and believe that they have control over what happens to them in general, have been proven to be happier than those who think everything happens willy-nilly.
Think about it: how optimistic can you possibly be if you think that no matter what you do - it has no bearing on the outcome? In spite of all your efforts, you may not find the right job, the right partner, or anything else… That helplessness certainly wouldn’t make you feel very motivated (or excited about life). In fact, we are lucky enough to have a considerable amount of choice in terms of our circumstances and, often, the outcomes.
There are certainly instances where we feel that the odds are not in our favor. But even in such cases, people have been able to succeed in spite of the obstacles. Acknowledge why you feel limited and open your mind. Career transition specialist Marta Kagan suggests that you:
“[A]sk yourself this question: Has anyone else EVER succeeded in spite of this problem/limitation? If your answer is “yes” - if you can think of or intuitively sense that even ONE person somewhere, at some point in history has overcome the challenge… then you know it’s nothing more than that - an excuse. Eliminate it!”
In fact, feeling helpless over our circumstances can affect our lives and health dramatically. The necessity of being able to exercise control was proven in a study of the aged in institutionalized homes,”elderly nursing home residents who were tested as part of an intervention designed to increase feelings of choice and personal responsibility over daily events”.
“In follow-up studies over the next two years they found those in the group given some control continued to be more active, and in fact, ultimately lived longer.”
That’s motivation enough to believe in - and take control of - our lives.
Some brilliant person has created “The Hall of Bad Gifts” blog, which is delighting me today.
My favorites so far:
The “Power Shoe Polisher” seems so unnecessary I can’t wait until it has its own infomercial (”Don’t you hate when you accidentally cover your face with shoe polish just before a big meeting?! Well no more!”)
There are some gifts that seem like they were found in the discount bin of a store - particularly when they aren’t at all appropriate for the recipient (though this gift might be awful regardless…).
I think I’ve developed allergies just looking at these.
Marketing guru and all-around good guy Seth Godin wrote a useful post about giving and getting, in which he itemizes five alternative ideas to giving this holiday season. I like all of his suggestions, from hand-crafted items to sending donations instead of gifts.
In any case, we rather brashly (though humbly) wanted to submit DreamBank as a possible sixth alternative gift buying strategy. Instead of giving and getting gifts that are sometimes unwanted, why not contribute to somebody’s dream gift? It rids the world of a lot of manufacturing, packaging and shipping costs of unwanted gifts, and gives somebody what they truly want. Plus, DreamBank gives 10% of all net revenues to charities that you choose like Kiva and Save the Children.
We’re constantly impressed by the generosity of our dreamers! So many of you want to collect money for a charity and we love you for it. It’s inspiring to see that your dream is to improve the lives of others.
And while we appreciate you posting these dreams on DreamBank, we can’t help but feel that there are sites better suited for raising funds for charities. For instance, a number of sites offer tax receipts and often do not charge transaction fees for contributions. While DreamBank gives a portion of its revenue to charities, we’d like charities you’re personally fundraising for to receive full benefits of your donation.
With that in mind, we wanted to tell you about a few sites that are ideal for this purpose. Please note that we are not affiliated with any of these platforms and this list of online fundraising sites is by no means exhaustive. We would also love suggestions from you on other great sites/tools you’ve used.
“GiveMeaning.com hosts fundraising pages on behalf of charities, non-profits and grassroots projects. Founded in 2004, GiveMeaning has provided free online fundraising pages to over 1200 different initiatives around the world.
From grass-roots international development projects to online fundraising pages for walks, swims and rides, you can create your own fundraising page at GiveMeaning.com to fundraise for most any benevolent purpose.”
ThePoint provides a clever way to entice people to contribute to a cause:
“Unlike traditional fundraisers, on The Point, no one parts with a dime until enough people pledge funds to reach the tipping point.
Whether you’re asking people to do something or give money, people only contribute if they think it makes a difference. That’s the problem with online petitions, mass letter-writing tools, or many fundraising efforts — it’s not clear how participation translates into results.
We set out to fix that. On The Point, all campaigns have a “tipping point” — people pledge to give money or do something, but no one does a thing until the conditions are met to make contributions worthwhile.”
“an online marketplace that connects you to the causes and countries you care about. You select the projects you want to support, make a tax-deductible contribution, and get regular progress updates - so you can see your impact.”
JustGiving (UK) offers you the ability to create a page so that others can contribute to your cause. “Justgiving helps charities cut their costs and raise more money.”
(Note: “For a donation to be eligible for Gift Aid, it must firstly be made by a UK taxpayer.”)
Watch the video below to see more of how JustGiving works:
Pincgiving
“Pinc’s Pages are where individuals or team participants can create a customized pledge page and collect online donations for a charity or cause. Track the progress of the fundraising goals in real-time. Send friends, family and people you know a personal message that asks for contributions for a walkathon, bowl-o-rama, golf-a-thon, bike ride or other fundraising event and collect and track peer-to-peer pledges.
Are there any sites you love for online fundraising? We’d love to hear your recommendations.
(Note: Want to learn more about these kinds of platforms? SocialActions has a list which highlights 30 social actions platforms.)
Wait, those two thoughts are entirely unrelated… You’d like us even without the prizes. …Right?
1) Enter our Gift Habits Contest: We’re running a three-minute survey about how you feel about giving and getting gifts. You could win an iPod Nano or the equivalent contribution to your DreamBank dream.
2) Are you on MySpace? We are, now! Check out our new MySpace page and feel free to friend us. We like friends.
The film “Garbage!” tackles these issues in a unique way. Andrew Nisker’s documentary centers around the lives of a family who took on his challenge: to keep their garbage in their garage for 3 months.
You can watch a short trailer on the site and even see a the first 20 minutes of the film by registering. Or read more about it on TVGuide or on Out of Green.
We continue our “Being Happy” series by discussing self-confidence and optimism.
An optimistic perspective is a large component of success.Have you ever had a conversation with a friend who repeatedly tells you that she “could never” do something?It’s not all that surprising, then, when she doesn’t do it.
Further, people who see the world (and others) in a negative light often have that perspective fulfilled in one sense or another: in expecting the worst of people, they paint their world in very drab colors.Whether their experience actually validates their position is almost irrelevant – they will frequently focus on the experiences that do…
Of course, it’s important to have a realistic perspective of people and occurrences – but believing in a positive outcomes can make a tremendous difference, not just in what you achieve, but in how you feel day-to-day. As counselor Julia Barnard wisely observes, an optimistic person can “accept and embrace the good things that happen. They do not put it down to luck or expect them to be fleeting.”
And while it may seem odd that a concept such as “liking yourself” should play an important role in goal achievement, believing in your ability to achieve a goal is greatly related to how you feel about yourself.“With confidence, you believe you can succeed.”
“Self-confident people trust their own abilities, have a general sense of control in their lives, and believe that, within reason, they will be able to do what they wish, plan, and expect.”
And discovering and taking stock of your strengths and what you like about yourself is vital to understanding why you should believe in yourself – and you can then focus on your abilities as well as work on what you would like to change.
Luckily you don’t have to be born optimistic - or with a high regard for yourself.Many studies have proven that most can change their outlook if committed.Your life may not be perfect all the time but a positive vision of yourself, your potential, and the world around you does “give you the opportunity to experience good things for a greater amount of time and be in a position to deal with the bad things in a positive, empowering way.”And that, in itself, makes cultivating these qualities worthwhile.
There is some difference between a fantasy and a dream.
While it’s tempting post a dream that invites your pals to contribute money towards your early retirement fund (at 30), your dream, both on this site and offline, will stand a greater chance of being fulfilled if it has some basis in reality.
I came across a fun cartoon recently which touched on this issue. I have to admit, I have a (few generally sane) friends who’s plans are very similar to the one depicted here:
New electronic gear comes with a price - and it’s not just the one that affects your pocketbook.
“[C]onsumers are hungry for the latest must-have devices. But as apartment dwellers eager to reclaim floor space replace their old sets with flat-screen wall TV’s, little thought is given to how the old model is discarded. Sometimes owners hold on to their old equipment, especially computers, for fear of losing personal data, but more often they give it to the super or dump it on the curb. And that means trouble for the environment.”
We often forget that our eagerness for the latest gadget or computer often has a dangerous impact on the environment – and a terrible impact on other countries who have to deal with the result of our overconsumption. Sadly, since places like India, China and Africa offer lower costs to recycle products than countries such as Canada, the US, or the UK, much of waste is sent there by companies wishing to save money. As a result, their citizens must deal with the disposal of hazardous wastes - and face the devastating impacts on the health that this process entails.
When we make the decision “out with the old and in with the new”, we need to also be mindful of what we will do with “the old”.
Free Geek is “ a nonprofit community organisation that reduces the environmental impact of waste electronics by reusing and recycling donated technology.” If you live in Vancouver, they’ll even pick up your machinery.
It is possible to have a new toy - and peace of mind as well. You just have to be aware - and make an effort.
DreamBank is very proud to support Save the Children, whose mission is to “bring immediate and lasting improvements to children’s lives through the realization of their rights.”
Since 1921, Save the Children Canada has been working for a world that respects and values each child, a world that listens to children and learns, and a world where all children have hope and opportunity.
Save the Children does amazing work advocating for children’s rights. The organization addresses issues such as HIV/AIDS, education, child protection in emergencies, and protection from exploitation.
We often forget that the terrible conflicts in some countries take a very severe toll on children. As a result, there are many areas of child rights that tend to be overlooked. Save the Children seeks to address many of the issues, such as with one of their current campaigns called “Rewrite the Future”. More than 32 million children around the world can’t go to school because they live in countries affected by armed conflict.
From long-term development to emergency relief, Save the Children helps children to achieve a happy, healthy and secure childhood. Save the Children has been advocating for a world that listens to children and involves them ensuring that their views are taken into account - a world where all children can grow up with hope and opportunity. On a day to day basis, and in cases of emergency, Save the Children works to secure and protect children’s rights to food, shelter, health care, education and freedom from violence, abuse and exploitation.
DreamBank is the new model for gift-giving that makes giving & receiving the perfect gift easy and also helps create positive change for the planet and important social causes.
